Hi, I'm new!
Hi everyone,
I have never been on a blog before, let alone something that I am really passionate about. I recently left my live in boyfriend of 3 years because I couldn't figure out why he never wanted to do anything. In the mist of the discussion he shared that he has SAD. Now, I feel that I want to do everything I can to understand where he is coming from and give him the support he deserves. He has been living with this for about 9 years and he hasn't ever told anyone but his parents and now me. Everything that frustrated me about him throughout our relationship, now upon reflection, is because of this. I love him more than anything and I am just hoping to connect with someone on here that can be my friend and offer advise. I am not sure if medication or therapy is where to start.....I just know I can't live without him and he can live in a world that makes him panic. Please help!
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a little advice
Just a little advice from my experiences. I am married. I have SAD and my husband is very outgoing. Just a few tips. Remember that he is suffering, probably in silence. Always be understanding. Don't make him feel childish.
Even if his fears seem unrealistic to you, they are very real to him. Be encouraging. Some people think constructive criticism is a good motivator, but if at all like me, any kind of criticism is discouraging. Try to be positive and just know that if you really love eachother, then you are the best thing for him. Having someone around him that will love him no matter what is the most important thing you can do for him.
Your situation seems very
Your situation seems very similiar to mine. I am a teacher, so I spend my whole life in front of people, meeting people and communicating. Before he shared that he was suffering with this, I just thought he was being an ass or that he didn't care enough about me to do things with me. And I completely understand about the constructive criticism. I would always try to push him to get a job because I knew he was smart, but now I realize that this was just making him even more upset because he felt like he was letting me down. I love him so much and I can't imagine my life without him, but I feel helpless too. I don't know what I can do for him to make him happy with his life. He is always very frustrated with himself because he wants to be outgoing, but he physically can't. And the suffering in silence is so true. I know that he is someone who continues to internalize everything, because he thinks that I will think he is crazy. I just feel like I can't help or even take some of the burden. Thank you so much for your advise. It is so hard to find people to talk to about this and I really appreciate your openness.